Daily Dose of Mama: If you love something, set it free

Thursday, December 3, 2009

If you love something, set it free

It was bound to happen sooner or later.

With Little Bug spreading his wings and getting more daring as he tries to walk by himself, it was inevitable that there would be a moment when I wasn't there to cushion his fall. I have to let him try on his own; I know that. He will only be able to truly succeed on his own if I give him the chance to do so. But, letting your child fail is very hard to do.

It could have been worse. One of those teeth could have actually been missing after I was able to clean up enough of the gushing blood to check.

With just a little bit of blood and tears still flowing, Little Bug continued to try to stand up and walk. Continued to dare to succeed. It took everything I had not to scoop my little crying, hurt baby up in my arms and carry him under my wing until he was all better. If he had wanted it, I would have. I wanted to.

But he didn't. He wanted to be brave and keep going.

So I had to let him try.

Our kids teach us so much about life. Sometimes I wonder how I lived the last 28 years without the lessons Little Bug has taught me in that last 14 months. Patience. Unconditional Love. Gratitude. Courage. Gritty Determination. How nearly all cliches are actually true.

If you love something, set it free.

At least a little bit.

5 comments:

AnonymousDecember 3, 2009 at 11:19 AM
Such a difficult thing to do! I struggle with this every day...
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KrisDecember 3, 2009 at 12:02 PM
It had to be hard not to swoop in hold him. It's awesome that he wanted to keep going after getting hurt.
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everythingismeowsomeDecember 3, 2009 at 12:34 PM
I know! Isaac always surprises me when he gets hurt. He wants one kiss, but then he says, "oh, I'm okay, mommy!". All at the same time, it makes me proud of him, but makes me wish I was a kangaroo so I could keep him in a pouch forever.
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kellyDecember 3, 2009 at 11:02 PM
Heart-breaking! And yet you must have been so proud of S. at the same time. These kids are amazingly strong and resilient.
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BekahDecember 4, 2009 at 9:08 AM
That must have been so hard! I'm so proud of Little Bug for wanting to keep going! Such an awesome little boy. :)
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Thanks for your daily dose of you....

Everyday Mama

I'm a 32-year-old everyday mama. My husband (Appa) and I adopted our first son Little Bug (at 10 months old) from Korea in September 2008. We adopted our second son, Little Bro, from Korea in April 2011 at age 21 months. We adopted our third son,Little Moon, at age 3 in November 2013. I've wanted to be a mama for a long time, but I'm still trying to figure out the reality of it all and take time to enjoy the delicate beauty of the highs and the lows.

I worked full time as an editor, which I loved; but I made the bittersweet decision to stay home with my children after Little Bro came home. I'm now clumsily finding my footing in a new world of housekeeping, menu planning, budgeting, cooking, cleaning, and rainy-day activities, as well as navigating the world of IEPs, parent advocacy, and special needs education (spoiler: I suck at house work). My husband is hot and smart and quiet and loyal, and I think (know) my sons are the cutest, happiest little boys in the world.

I also struggle at times with mild depression, anxiety, post-adoption depression, my husband's constant absence due to his stressful and super time-consuming job, the challenges of helping my older son with his sometimes exhausting special needs, and our transition to a family of three little boys with just 19 and 14 months between them. I worry way too much about what people think of me, hate talking on the phone, and I am trying to trust myself more.

Oh yeah, I'm unable to give birth to children; love books, writing, traveling, and the color brown; hate to clean, cook, craft, or do laundry; allergic to pretty much everything but food (thank God); and think camping in anything but a tent is lame.

I needed somewhere to drop my daily mama thoughts and musings on toddler poop to avoid massive clutter and ramblings on our private family blog. Writing it down on paper is so '90s.

This is my everyday "blournal" as I navigate through my life as a first-time (or is it third-time now?) mama and long-time me. So....hi.

You can contact me at daily.dose.of.mama (at) gmail.com.

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