Daily Dose of Mama: Reality Check

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Reality Check

3 posts in like 12 hours...my mind is a-spinning lately.

I just got a nice dose of reality in the form of Little Bug's occupational therapist (OT) who has been with him for over a year.

She's officially giving up on him.

Seriously?

Little Bug has made AMAZING strides in the last year, and he seems to be on the cusp of so much more. His OT has always been the farthest behind, but part of that was attributed to the fact that he was focusing on other things to develop....he's just a baby; he can't do everything all at once.

But, his OT has decided the progress just isn't enough. She thinks he needs OT twice a week (that would be, for those who are counting, 6 therapy sessions a week for Little Bug), and she thinks she isn't the one for the job anymore. She is officially assessing him at 11 months developmentally in fine motor skills. I'm being honest when I say that it stings a bit, but I am not distraught about it. (Little Bug was assessed at 3-4 months old overall when he was 11.5 months old...that is a much harder pill to swallow for some reason.)

You know what....Good. Go. Like I told Appa on the phone when he was worried about breaking this "bond" she has with Little Bug.....

She doesn't believe in my kid; she has no business being around him.

So we move on. We get a new OT who will hopefully come in with a new energy and drive. We continue to stick with the PT, DT, and ST who have been so wonderful to celebrate those little victories with us. We don't let the opinions of one woman who clearly isn't feeling it shape the opinions and hopes and dreams of those of us who totally are feeling it.

However, it is a good reality check for me. Not everyone will see past the wobbles and toy banging and drooling and cheerful smile and hugs to the intense stubbornness and perseverance and patience that makes up our son.

And that is fine, but those people don't need to be in our lives.

3 comments:

KrisOctober 13, 2009 at 9:47 AM
Oh my gosh. Shame on her, such a quitter. She could learn a thing or two from the persistence of Little Bug. You are right - she needs to GO.
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kellyOctober 13, 2009 at 12:23 PM
Good riddance to her! I'm sorry that Little Bug will need to get used to another therapist but it will be worth it in the end. I'm sure there's an amazing one out there that you're meant to meet. And I agree with Kris - Little Bug obviously has more perseverance than that quitter.
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everythingismeowsomeOctober 13, 2009 at 1:15 PM
On the one hand, I say that is flat out crappy. On the other hand, if her abilities are really that limited, then bring in someone better! And let's be clear here, she is the one who feels she can't grow further as an OT. But there is no doubt that Little Bug has lots more growing and developing to do. And he is DEFINITELY up to the task!
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Thanks for your daily dose of you....

Everyday Mama

I'm a 32-year-old everyday mama. My husband (Appa) and I adopted our first son Little Bug (at 10 months old) from Korea in September 2008. We adopted our second son, Little Bro, from Korea in April 2011 at age 21 months. We adopted our third son,Little Moon, at age 3 in November 2013. I've wanted to be a mama for a long time, but I'm still trying to figure out the reality of it all and take time to enjoy the delicate beauty of the highs and the lows.

I worked full time as an editor, which I loved; but I made the bittersweet decision to stay home with my children after Little Bro came home. I'm now clumsily finding my footing in a new world of housekeeping, menu planning, budgeting, cooking, cleaning, and rainy-day activities, as well as navigating the world of IEPs, parent advocacy, and special needs education (spoiler: I suck at house work). My husband is hot and smart and quiet and loyal, and I think (know) my sons are the cutest, happiest little boys in the world.

I also struggle at times with mild depression, anxiety, post-adoption depression, my husband's constant absence due to his stressful and super time-consuming job, the challenges of helping my older son with his sometimes exhausting special needs, and our transition to a family of three little boys with just 19 and 14 months between them. I worry way too much about what people think of me, hate talking on the phone, and I am trying to trust myself more.

Oh yeah, I'm unable to give birth to children; love books, writing, traveling, and the color brown; hate to clean, cook, craft, or do laundry; allergic to pretty much everything but food (thank God); and think camping in anything but a tent is lame.

I needed somewhere to drop my daily mama thoughts and musings on toddler poop to avoid massive clutter and ramblings on our private family blog. Writing it down on paper is so '90s.

This is my everyday "blournal" as I navigate through my life as a first-time (or is it third-time now?) mama and long-time me. So....hi.

You can contact me at daily.dose.of.mama (at) gmail.com.

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As an editor, I deal with people on a regular basis who think images or content on the internet (whether it does or does not have a copyright designation) are "fair use." Your lesson for the day is that anything someone writes or creates that is published on the internet is copyright protected, whether he or she spells it out or not. Although I doubt anyone wants to steal my riveting posts on toddler poop, it doesn't hurt to educate the world about the wonderful magic of online copyright law.