Daily Dose of Mama: Here Baby Baby

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Here Baby Baby

I've been in a funk the last few days, and I finally figured out why.

I miss my baby.

Although I am not broadcasting this far and wide, this blog is technically anonymous and Appa alluded to it on our family blog, so I don't mind saying that I happen to be alone this week. Appa had some time off so he took Little Bug to visit with some extended family in another state. I'm very happy for them, and they seem to be having a nice time.

They've been gone since Sunday morning and won't be back for a few more days…shattering my previous 48-hours-without-Little Bug record. I was actually really looking forward to some "me time," and I am working on a home project that would be exceptionally hard to do with Little Bug home and in need of "Mama time." I've been staying up late to watch movies and read and not eating my veggies and might even jump on my bed later. It's been great.

Yet, I ache to see my baby. I'm watching old videos on my blog just to hear his voice, staring at pictures to enjoy his smile, and generally mopping around like someone just took my favorite shiny toy. I can't focus as well at work because I am constantly e-mailing Appa to get the play-by-play of Little Bug's day. Appa posted a little video last night, which I have watched more times than anyone should watch a blog video (and have a new mantra, "Pull UP his pants!").

This isn't just a matter of missing Little Bug. I miss new episodes of The OC and Nerd Blizzards at Dairy Queen.

No, I don't just miss my child, I crave him, and I cannot wait until he is home.

1 comment:

BekahOctober 30, 2009 at 9:27 AM
Hey there...I didn't know that you were home alone this week. We should have totally gotten together for dinner or something! I'm always up for a little get together!
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Thanks for your daily dose of you....

Everyday Mama

I'm a 32-year-old everyday mama. My husband (Appa) and I adopted our first son Little Bug (at 10 months old) from Korea in September 2008. We adopted our second son, Little Bro, from Korea in April 2011 at age 21 months. We adopted our third son,Little Moon, at age 3 in November 2013. I've wanted to be a mama for a long time, but I'm still trying to figure out the reality of it all and take time to enjoy the delicate beauty of the highs and the lows.

I worked full time as an editor, which I loved; but I made the bittersweet decision to stay home with my children after Little Bro came home. I'm now clumsily finding my footing in a new world of housekeeping, menu planning, budgeting, cooking, cleaning, and rainy-day activities, as well as navigating the world of IEPs, parent advocacy, and special needs education (spoiler: I suck at house work). My husband is hot and smart and quiet and loyal, and I think (know) my sons are the cutest, happiest little boys in the world.

I also struggle at times with mild depression, anxiety, post-adoption depression, my husband's constant absence due to his stressful and super time-consuming job, the challenges of helping my older son with his sometimes exhausting special needs, and our transition to a family of three little boys with just 19 and 14 months between them. I worry way too much about what people think of me, hate talking on the phone, and I am trying to trust myself more.

Oh yeah, I'm unable to give birth to children; love books, writing, traveling, and the color brown; hate to clean, cook, craft, or do laundry; allergic to pretty much everything but food (thank God); and think camping in anything but a tent is lame.

I needed somewhere to drop my daily mama thoughts and musings on toddler poop to avoid massive clutter and ramblings on our private family blog. Writing it down on paper is so '90s.

This is my everyday "blournal" as I navigate through my life as a first-time (or is it third-time now?) mama and long-time me. So....hi.

You can contact me at daily.dose.of.mama (at) gmail.com.

THE CONTENT OF THIS BLOG IS COPYRIGHT PROTECTED.

As an editor, I deal with people on a regular basis who think images or content on the internet (whether it does or does not have a copyright designation) are "fair use." Your lesson for the day is that anything someone writes or creates that is published on the internet is copyright protected, whether he or she spells it out or not. Although I doubt anyone wants to steal my riveting posts on toddler poop, it doesn't hurt to educate the world about the wonderful magic of online copyright law.