Daily Dose of Mama: Six

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Six

6 months ago today we made the decision to adopt Little Bro.

In comparison, 6 months from the day we said yes to Little Bug's referral, I was just going back to work after finishing my maternity leave, our moratorium on house guests had been lifted, and I was so comfortable with my son that I was posting his constipation face pictures on our family blog.

The fact that I actively went back to my family blog to verify this information is slightly pathetic.

Honestly, although I have (really) bad days, the wait isn't killing me. Resigning myself from the beginning that the wait will be overly long has oddly helped tremendously....it allows me feel like I have some control over this process....like I CHOSE to endure this wait. Having Little Bug home takes the sting off the wait. I can't go sit morosely in an empty nursery and pout. I don't fixate on mothers in the grocery story, creepily stalking them with my eyes.

Although realistically we're going to be waiting 14-15 months from the moment we said "yes" to bring our son home, and as I type that I acknowledge how ridiculous that is, I don't feel so miserable as I look forward.

Instead I'll just say:

"Here's to the next 6 weeks, 6 months, and 6 years, Little Bro. I love that you are in my life."

7 comments:

JoJoOctober 24, 2010 at 2:52 PM
I'm glad you are having a good day on this 6 month marker. We all miss you little bro and hope you are home soon!
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Christine @ 12,450miles October 24, 2010 at 6:01 PM
Seriously, you amaze me. Posts like this inspire me to be a better person. I don't think I will ever fully wrap my head around this wait (that is just an abstract concept to me) I do think of you and little bro often...
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sueOctober 24, 2010 at 6:23 PM
as soon as i saw the title of this post, i knew what it was about. i know it's not easy for you guys (how could it be), but you really are handling it so well. i hope i have half as much grace as you when our time comes. as jojo said, we miss little bro and we can't until he is home!!
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AnonymousOctober 24, 2010 at 9:22 PM
I really admire your strength and positive outlook. Little Bro and Little Bug are lucky to have such a strong mama! Your family is in my thoughts. I can't wait to hear that Little Bro is finally coming home!
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Annie BOctober 24, 2010 at 9:52 PM
Yeah, I'm also in awe of your maturity on this one. It does help to know you're in for the long haul from the outset, I suppose. And, you really brought Bug home LESS THAN SIX MONTHS AFTER DECIDING TO ADOPT? That kind of blows me away too. Anyway, happy 6 months - you have to be closer than your were 6 months ago, right?
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KristenOctober 25, 2010 at 9:28 AM
what a great perspective on your absurdly long wait for Little Bro.
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kellyOctober 25, 2010 at 11:38 AM
C, you are amazing. This wait is ridiculously long and yet you really are handling it with such class and maturity. I admire you so much. None of us can wait for Little Bro to be HOME. That will be a wonderful day for you and for the rest of us who think about you all the time. In the meantime, feel free to have a few mental break-downs now and then. We are here for you.
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Thanks for your daily dose of you....

Everyday Mama

I'm a 32-year-old everyday mama. My husband (Appa) and I adopted our first son Little Bug (at 10 months old) from Korea in September 2008. We adopted our second son, Little Bro, from Korea in April 2011 at age 21 months. We adopted our third son,Little Moon, at age 3 in November 2013. I've wanted to be a mama for a long time, but I'm still trying to figure out the reality of it all and take time to enjoy the delicate beauty of the highs and the lows.

I worked full time as an editor, which I loved; but I made the bittersweet decision to stay home with my children after Little Bro came home. I'm now clumsily finding my footing in a new world of housekeeping, menu planning, budgeting, cooking, cleaning, and rainy-day activities, as well as navigating the world of IEPs, parent advocacy, and special needs education (spoiler: I suck at house work). My husband is hot and smart and quiet and loyal, and I think (know) my sons are the cutest, happiest little boys in the world.

I also struggle at times with mild depression, anxiety, post-adoption depression, my husband's constant absence due to his stressful and super time-consuming job, the challenges of helping my older son with his sometimes exhausting special needs, and our transition to a family of three little boys with just 19 and 14 months between them. I worry way too much about what people think of me, hate talking on the phone, and I am trying to trust myself more.

Oh yeah, I'm unable to give birth to children; love books, writing, traveling, and the color brown; hate to clean, cook, craft, or do laundry; allergic to pretty much everything but food (thank God); and think camping in anything but a tent is lame.

I needed somewhere to drop my daily mama thoughts and musings on toddler poop to avoid massive clutter and ramblings on our private family blog. Writing it down on paper is so '90s.

This is my everyday "blournal" as I navigate through my life as a first-time (or is it third-time now?) mama and long-time me. So....hi.

You can contact me at daily.dose.of.mama (at) gmail.com.

THE CONTENT OF THIS BLOG IS COPYRIGHT PROTECTED.

As an editor, I deal with people on a regular basis who think images or content on the internet (whether it does or does not have a copyright designation) are "fair use." Your lesson for the day is that anything someone writes or creates that is published on the internet is copyright protected, whether he or she spells it out or not. Although I doubt anyone wants to steal my riveting posts on toddler poop, it doesn't hurt to educate the world about the wonderful magic of online copyright law.