This morning when I dropped Little Bug off at school, a small group of boys noticed he was heading over to play with them.
En mass, they all started chanting, "No, Little Bug, No" and hiding all the toys from him.
Little Bug stood there at the edge of the "friendship carpet" with a sad look on his face while these four boys chanted their cruel taunt. I know he probably doesn't get the full social implications of what they were saying (nor do these other little 2 years olds who are chanting it), but he gets "No, Little Bug, No" and he gets when kids don't want to share with him.
And it makes him sad.
I started to bend down to the little boys and nicely tell them we play with all our friends when the teacher swooped in to set them right.
Just in time because I was near tears. My heart was hurting so badly for my baby in that moment.
I gave Little Bug a light kiss and blew out of there, desperate to keep the tears from falling until I reached the car. The cool Fall air was the only thing that saved me. The minute I got in the car, I began to cry.
How will I ever be able to do this?
How can I spend the rest of my life waking up and letting my children leave my side when I know they might face teasing or taunting or bullying or hurt feelings. How can I bear knowing they might be sad or feel bad about themselves?
The plight of a parent, I suppose.
I know I can't protect my kids from this childhood reality. Every child will encounter it in some form. Every child will probably be the perpetrator at some point, too. Even mine.
All I can do it give Little Bug the best self esteem possible and hopefully teach him how to push past these incidents in a positive manner. How I will do that....I'm not sure.
I do know that me crying won't help.
So I've gotten it out of my system. I'm truly aware now that no matter how nice of a school or how experienced a teacher or how cushy the room, Little Bug is going to experience times where he is the odd one out. That's the nature of childhood.
I cannot protect him from the real world.
And the real world is going to suck at times for him.
But OH how it hurts my heart to think of it.
No, crying won't help, but here I am crying with you. For Little Bug, and for my boys, and for all the kids who are on the teasing end at one time or another. The real world, does indeed, suck.
ReplyDeleteeven knowing this is part of childhood, it still stings to see it happen to your kid.
ReplyDeleteThe Real World does suck. I too would love to protect my kids from all the yucky stuff that the world has to offer. It's so hard to let them learn that things aren't always like it is at home. (I sure wish all kids were nice kids!)
ReplyDeleteYou are a great Mama!!
Oh man...this was so rough to read. I can only imagine how badly it hurt to experience it. I'm so sorry that you and Little Bug had this happen. Although tears won't stop this from happening, it's definitely ok to cry. The real world does suck sometimes. ((HUGS)) mama. I'm really sorry that this is how your day had to start.
ReplyDeleteYou got my tears rolling early on in this post. It is heartbreaking to see your child have his feelings hurt – his vulnerability (and mine) hits the hardest at those moments. Just so painful. The thing is, though, by the end you had me feeling so hopeful and reminding me that I HAVE to be strong, that the parent is the model for the child. Once again, you handled this situation so well and bit back those tears – you are a great mama!
ReplyDeletemy heart hurt while i read this. i think these are the parts of parenthood that we can never prepare ourselves for.
ReplyDeletewe had a teasing situation at the park recently and my heart hurt for my son. i cried that evening while telling b about it.
i know we can't and we shouldn't, but sometimes i wish we could put them in a protective bubble.
oh c, this makes my heart hurt so bad. i'm completely unprepared for this part of parenthood. you handled it well.
ReplyDeleteI know. I know it doesn't help and I know it doesn't make things better. But I know and I am so grateful I have you! Who would have thought that the person that understands the most is the person I spent my entire childhood fighting.
ReplyDeleteKristi, I know! What a funny little trick life played on you and I (and poor, long-suffering Mom and Dad)!
ReplyDeleteThis makes me so sad! What a way to start your week. I get sad when Joel says hi to someone and they don't say hi back, so I can't imagine when I experience something like this. Hugs to you!
ReplyDeleteMy heart hurt reading this. The real world does suck sometimes! I have definitely cried my share of tears dealing with this part of parenthood. It is so hard. I'm not sure I would have been strong enough to hold the tears in until the car... you did good, mama!
ReplyDeleteThis makes me so, so sad. Like the other Christine, I can barely handle my son getting snubbed with a hello... I can't even imagine what this felt like. HUGS friend
ReplyDeleteUgh, poor little bug and mommy. I think about this all the time lately. There are so many things we can't protect them from the older and more independent they get. It's hard.
ReplyDeleteWho knew MEAN Boys started at age 2-3? Sorry for your experience. This has not happened to us yet but I know the day will be coming.
ReplyDeleteReality bites.
Hope today is better
I often wish I could keep my boys in a bubble. Kudos to you for managing to hold back your tears. Parenthood is at the same time, amazingly wonderful and completely heartbreaking, especially when things like that happen. Lucky for Little Bug he has a mommy like you who is thinking about these things now, and will be able to give him the love and support he needs to get through tough times.
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